Sex and Romance

"Sex and romance never really meet.  Romance is in a certain way like a created idea, a mind thing.  Example: A man and woman are being totally present sitting having dinner.  A man is totally present sitting with a woman and is so present with her and taking in every little nuance of her movement, every little movement of her lips, everything.  It is because of his presence that he is taking this in.  It is not like he is sitting and gawking at her.  He is actually feeling how her movement cuts the air in the room.  He is feeling how, as she breathes out, her breath ricochets through her body.  He is that present and aware.

Someone sitting at the next table notices this amount of awareness and how the woman is practically having shivers.  She is practically orgasmic at the table.  So the person sitting looking on thinks, "How romantic".  But for the two people involved, this is not romance at all.  This is called being present.  Romance is almost unconscious therefore has developed as a way of mimicking someone who is present.

From that standpoint I would say that sex is something that would come naturally through presence and authenticity.  It could never be mimicked, never be performed.  It has to be felt and directly experienced.  Sex comes out of authenticity, and romance comes out of a mental attempt to displace something you are not actually in touch with."

-Nityama